Have just been watching my tape of that 4 Corners report about football and rape. Hey Laurie's uncle, wassup. You're on TV! By the way, check out Perth Rock City for hilarious animations of the football raping mentality. Anyway, the 4 Corners report was less hilarious, kinda scary really, and made me kinda make up some new rules for myself, and for girls generally.

Rule #1
Stay away from footballers.
Rule #2
If you accidentally find yourself around footballers, try to leave as soon as possible and DO NOT get incapacitated in any way.
Rule #3
If you meet a really nice guy and you really like him and he's a footballer, DO NOT go anywhere with him until you've asked these questions; "Are your mates going to be there? Do you make a habit of watching your mates rape girls? Have you ever raped girls?" Just normal, getting to know you stuff. Oh sorry, you should also ask if he's raped boys. That is also bad. Rape is bad.

I know that this is judgemental and tarring the whole football community with one brush, and that I would be highly incensed if anyone had rules about not fraternising with Muslims out of a general, irrational fear of coming to harm because incidences of violence by members of that community had come to be seen as symptomatic of a culture of belief/behaviour in that community. I know this is wrong. And it's a very recent thing for me. I never thought of footballers as rapist before all this. And there are more allegations today. Some players from my club, Hawthorn, apparently went to Daniel Chick's wedding in Hawaii five years ago, and while there did some sightseeing, some scuba, some raping. I mean, you don't wanna fly all that way just for a wedding, do ya? And I really liked the players who were around Hawthorn five years ago. That's pretty much where my knowledge of the club ends, cos I kinda stopped paying attention to footy after school finished. I liked all those players, knew all their names, and five of them might be rapists? Whoah! Just generally, how can they do that? You hear the accounts, like on 4 Corners on Monday, and it's just sick. I mean, they're raping people! And they tend, it seems, to do it in such a way that lots of people know about it, and then the club knows about it, and players who weren't even there know about it, and everyone still keeps quiet and won't be the one to 'put their mate/s in it' or anything. Eeeek!

Oh man. I so cannot sustain this argument without hypocrisy. I wanna say things like "You just can't trust em" and "They think differently from you and me about women" and stuff. Arrgh! I mean, no-one has actually been prosecuted, all investigations have led to findings of 'insufficient evidence' etc. I can't justify my new rules in any way. But still, now I'm suspicious of every footballer I see on TV. All those sweet-looking faces, and I'm thinking, "Have you?" Or "Have your friends? And if so, are they still your friends?" Stuff like that. It's so wrong. I'm prejudiced now. It's not okay.