Hee hee. Last night I went to see The Datsuns at the Hifi. Hee hee. Me so happy. Of course they rocked, blah blah, we had a great pozzie, blah blah, cherished moments of close physical proximity, blah blah. All of which, though fabulous, nonetheless contributed to the sense I always get of being so near yet so far. You can see them, hear them, watch their faces and bodies, appreciate what they are doing, even get splattered with their sweat, but you'll never get to live a life like theirs. They've got something else. Brilliant events like rock gigs, or comedy shows, always leave me split. They thrill me. They give me definitive proof that, at least for a few hours, some people exist. And yet at the same time, such events make me more than usually aware that the lives of audiences and performers don't intersect. Thus for me, gigs reveal both the reason why the performers are part of my bubble, and also provide all that is needed to burst it. Temporarily. You see, whereas for much of the time you can fool yourself into thinking that you have world-class qualities, brushes with the real thing cannot but reveal the gaping chasm between your league and theirs. You live your life forgetting this, and after the gig you will forget it again, but when you are actually there, you can't escape the stark reality invading your world. Also, whenever I am in a crowd, like last night, I become more acutely aware than usual that my body isn't one that invites the random acts of interaction that are required to start something. This poses a problem for me, because, when I go to a gig, I'm usually carrying days and days worth of daydreams in which I somehow (and there are a variety of scenarios) fall into vibrant conversation with the people I have come to see play. These daydreams rely on random acts of interaction. However, as soon as I actually get there, it becomes clear that there is little chance of that happeneing to anybody, let alone to me. Even the cool people have no chance. And then there's me, who has less of a chance than the cool people, who themselves have no chance. This is the truth of rock gigs. Another truth is that The Datsuns rock.