Saturday, June 12, 2004

Last night I got home from work to find that my little brother had unplugged the TV and all its accoutrements and had moved it down the hall to the front room so that he could watch the DVDs he'd borrowed in peace, away from the chatter of the dinner party mum and dad were hosting. This also, of course, meant that he'd thoughtlessly unplugged the VCR and therefore wiped my pre-record settings, which meant that on my return home I found that no trashy TV had been collected onto videotape during my absence! The light at the end of the darkness of my shift was gone. Pfft. Never to be seen again. I mean, as if such things as Miriam going into the Big Brother house, or Alicia Silverstone being an attorney by day and matchmaker by night, or Eliza Dushku having some kind of calling and being named Tru, are ever going to be repeated on my TV screen again. These episodes are lost to me! Damn my stupid brother! Anyway, so I had to make do with one of the DVDs he had rented. The choices were Spellbound and Wonderland, but as I'd already seen the spelling bee doco, I went with the grisly later life of a porn king. And it was pretty good. Val Kilmer was good. I didn't recognise Dylan McDermott until I read the credits at the end, so I was able to enjoy his performance, too. The acting was pretty solid all around, the story was interesting, LA's underbelly felt decidedly seedy and unsafe, and there was a brief cameo by Paris Hilton with splotchy fake-tanned boobs. What more do ya need, really? Yep, it was a good movie. Strangely, I wasn't tense at any point during it, which is weird for me and violent movies, or movies in which I know violence is approaching. But anyway, yeah, Wonderland is good. One of the special features on the DVD is a little sick, though. Having said that, I watched it all the way through. See, they've treated us to the police video of the crime scene, taken only hours after the murders, noting all the blood spatters and the ransacking and the locations and positions and traumas of the victims, who are still lying where they fell after being ferociously set upon and beaten to pieces with metal pipes. It's weird, but these real dead bodies didn't look real at all. Maybe it was the camera quality but their flesh looked kinda waxen, like Madame Tussaud's people had pulled the old switcheroo. But I guess that's just how people look when they're dead. Also, they were probably less recognisable as people because their skulls were bashed in, with much of the contents splattered on the surrounding walls, bed linen, carpet. If you're ever in LA, stay away from a guy called Eddie Nash. He's a bad man.

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