Period Romance

Alejandro was nervous. Although he had brushed against Fermina almost daily for most of his life while serving her meals, and had had her slim ankle and the small of her back regularly in his powerful grasp while boosting her into her riding saddle, nonetheless, their brief moments of physical contact or proximity had never lasted for anything like the extended period of time that was just commencing. In the carriage, the warmth of her adjacent body radiated into his thigh. Despite his pleasure, he was anxious, and all too aware that his time with her would soon be over. "Our time is running out", he silently mused, and the thought pained him. It would take a journey of a few days to reach the eastern port city of Valencia, from whence Fermina was due to depart. He dreaded their arrival there. It would be the last place he would ever see her dusky beauty, and, with every revolution of the carriage wheels, it was approaching. Alejandro willed Franz Ferdinand, the coachman, to drive too roughly over a rocky patch and damage a wheel or a hoof, granting more time for, for... Delay, delay. His immediate thoughts were of delay. Let us just be still, and alone! Oh, San Isidro, good saint, cannot you aid me by your divine graces while we remain in Madrid? Something needed to happen. They were approaching the Rio Manzanares already, and its dark waters filled him with foreboding. But it was not they that would take Fermina away from him. That honour resided in the deep well of the sea, with which, before long, his salty tears would mix without restraint. He would have to leave her there. And return in bitterness to Count Daza’s service. She would be lost to him forever. He dropped his head slightly under the growing weight of this realisation. Then he remembered himself, and moved his head almost imperceptibly to the left. His eye moved to its corner, and strained to fix upon her drowsy loveliness. His mind thundered with fractious arguments about what to do. The time was now, he knew, and it was slipping from him as each moment passed. He resisted the impulse to grab her and declare, “If you leave here, you’ll leave me broken!” For he did not wish to alter anything about the scene, or to stir her into shifting away from him. To feel the warmth of her body gave him the most profound joy he had yet experienced. His muscles were so tensed from maintaining his taut position beside her that he ached. He feared the loss of this contact, and was panicked by the thought, “If I move, this could die”. Yet how could he possibly hope to change any of what they were hurtling towards if he was too timid to fracture this new and long dreamt of intimacy? He had to break the silence while there was still time.

The carriage jolted. They had begun the chaotic task of negotiating Madrid’s unpaved lanes and alleys. The sudden jostling effected Fermina’s equilibrium, and she instinctively flung her arms out on each side, in blind search of something to steady her and keep her from toppling forward. When the violence had passed and she began to be accustomed to the carriage’s new rhythm, she looked down to find she had regained her balance by grabbing Alejandro’s knee, and that her hand had remained there for some duration. She flushed and looked at him wildly, withdrawing her hand quickly and delivering a breathy “I’m sorry”. As she cast her eyes down at the floor, she could feel his gaze upon her. Until this, he had seemed to her to be keenly focussed on some internal question. But now she felt as if something were about to happen, and didn’t know whether or not to be afraid.

The city walls would not be reached for a few minutes yet. Alejandro had made no plans, but only thought of how critical it was to intervene now, before it became too late. He tenderly reached out his hand and lifted Fermina’s chin, raising her gaze to meet his. He decided that to reveal his own feelings would only serve to shock her. Especially considering that she had just uttered the first direct words that they had ever exchanged. As the situation was urgent, he felt that now was not the time to declare everything he had ever felt and would forever feel for her. Though these were the feelings propelling him to act on her behalf, he felt their expression a hindrance to the task at hand. He loved her. He wanted her to stay. To be near her always was his life’s dream. But her life was slipping away from her. Her freedom was now paramount. “My Lady”, he whispered, “if you wish it and have courage, I won’t be leaving here with you”.

“Alejandro, what do you mean?”

“Please. There is little time. If you wish not to go where your father would have you put, if you wish to be free of his control but also of his protection, I would urge you to disappear into the city tonight. When we reach the gate, I will help you escape if you choose it”.

“Escape?”

“Yes. When the wall guards stop us, you can run away. I will continue to Valencia. No one will be wise to it until it is too late for them to find you. Is this what you want?”

“Yes. But I would not put you in harm’s way, and set my father’s will against you. Your mother…”

“Please, this is your only chance. The wall is approaching.”

The carriage had begun to slow. Fermina looked intently into Alejandro’s eyes, clasped his hand, and nodded. She felt the rush of hope fill her chest. Her life would be completely new. Alejandro shot her a warning look. “It will not be easy. In Madrid, there is nothing except what you bring with you. And you will not have much more than yourself. When I return, you may rest assured that I will find you. But I worry about these early days…” Alejandro could not bear to think of the multitude of dangers she would face. What if he had forced a rash decision upon her? But her intent gaze told him of the strength and depth of her resolve. The carriage stopped. “I will get out, and shield you with my body. Fermina, be careful. Run into the shadows.” Alejandro moved across her and opened the door. With agility, he stepped out of the carriage, and stood leaning with affected nonchalance against the frame, his cloak masking Fermina’s movement behind him. The guards began sidling over to conduct their cursory papers check, and Alejandro hissed, “Go!” Fermina pressed herself to his muscular back for the briefest of moments, a silent farewell, then moved quietly around to the back of the carriage and rushed across the street into the darkness of a nearby lane. She couldn’t help thinking, “This is so stupid!” But neither could she help feeling exhilarated by the immediate enlargement of her prospects. In a moment, she was enveloped by the city. Alejandro finished with the guards, returned to the carriage, and, once the gates had been opened, choked out the order - “Take me out.”